


Look Out For You

by Itlivesforever



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Friendship, Nightmares, Platonic or not? You decide, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Rey Needs A Hug, So Finn gives her a hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-22
Updated: 2016-03-22
Packaged: 2018-05-28 11:35:58
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,665
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6327379
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Itlivesforever/pseuds/Itlivesforever
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rey is a hero now, thrown into an adventure that she never could have imagined a few months ago. But the nightmares she has now don't make her feel like a hero.</p><p>Luckily for her, Finn plans to stay by her side until she defeats these dreams.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Look Out For You

_Flashes, flashes of everything._

_Flashes of bright lights glinting on metal, and of cold that sparked through her as her skin met steel. Flashes of panic as she found herself restrained and helpless against faceless captors, pain as one strikes her with his blaster. Flashes of fear as a monsterous shadow looms over where she sits trapped and still. A hand pressing inches from her skull, digging through her mind and making her head throb. Dark threats flowing off of a wicked tongue that matches wicked eyes that stare into hers. Sweat dripping down her face as she fights and fights and fights but she's losing strength and her mind is giving up and --_

Rey sits up wildly, gasping for breath. Her hands grip her head, covering her ears as half her brain screams _"Get out of my mind, getoutgetoutgetout"_ even though the other half knows that it was only another nightmare. She had long been free of the awful grasp of the First Order. She knew she was at the Resistance Base now, where she was safe. No one was assaulting her head here.

Still, it takes a few more moments, a few more tears, for the logical half of her brain to win. _"Just another bad dream"_ she reminds herself, even though she fully knows that it was all real. It all happened. Her capture by Kylo Ren, how she was hurt physically and mentally while in the First Order's hold. Nearly fifteen years of being on her own on Jakku and she had never felt as lonely and afraid as in that holding cell. So even as the tears stop and she is able to breathe normally again, Rey is entirely aware that she isn't going to be able to fall back asleep here, alone. Not with her heart still racing and memories of torture still buzzing around her.

So she does the same thing she does every other time nightmares plague her sleep: ventures to Finn's room. She quickly pulls a jacket over her thin sleep clothes, given to her by the Resistance, and puts on her shoes. With that, she clicks open her door and makes her way down the hall to his.

It takes meer seconds after Rey's gentle knock for the door to open. Sometimes she wonders if Finn simply waits for her to come knocking every night. It's not as if this wasn't routine by now. Her horrifying dreams were definitely a weekly occurance, even with Luke helping her meditate in an attempt to stop them. Ever since she and Luke had returned to D'Qar, something the medical droids called PTSD had taken its hold on the scavenger girl. They had explained to her how all of the events she experienced in such a short period of time were effecting her mind. Luke assured her that with proper training she would be able to surpess them.

But until then, Finn welcomes her into his room whenever she needs, with kindness and concern written on his features every time.

"Another one?" He asks softly, taking her hand as they sat on the edge of his bed. When she nodded he squeezed her hand gently, comfortingly. "Do you want to talk about it?" 

Rey gave an unsteady sigh before nodding again. "It was the interrogation. The restraints, the guards that hit me, that monster Kylo Ren clawing in my head. It all hurt so much, but I was strong then. I pushed through it all. Why is it still hurting me _now_?" Her tears fall freely again onto her cheeks, and drip onto her friend's arms as he hugs her close. He shushes her quietly, like a parent holding a scared child. It broke him to see her so small and afraid, after he'd seen how incredibly strong she truly was. She deserved so much better.

"Rey, what happened to you was awful. What the First Order did. They _tortured_ you for kriff's sake but you fought _back_. You used the Force to kick their sorry asses, you beat Kylo Ren, in mind and in battle. You stole the kriffin' Millennium Falcon and proved yourself to be one of the best damn pilots I've ever known. You brought back _Luke Skywalker,_ Rey, you saved the galaxy and you were the only one that could." He hugged her even closer as a lopsided smile broke on her face. "You were strong then, and you're strong now. You've been through so much, we all have," he said, glancing down at the bandage that still wrapped around his torso to the scar on his back. "We're all just people who got thrown into this mess, and it's cost us all a lot. But you've proven that you can _handle_ it. I know you can, and so does Luke, and General Organa and everyone who's seen what you're capable of." 

Rey leans into him, taking in his presence and his words. "Thank you," she whispers, because it's all she can find to say.

"I'm sorry I pulled you into this mess," Finn says, suddenly sounding disheartened, and even distant. "You're thanking me but if it wasn't for me you would never have dealt with those horrible things." It was something he thought about a lot. His role in the pain she was feeling now.

At that Rey sat up and stared at him, shocked. "Finn, how is any of this your fault? You've been nothing but a friend to me! The first real friend I ever had, except perhaps Beebee-Ate."

He sighed, thinking of all the times he brought trouble upon the girl sitting beside him. "If it wasn't for me finding you in Jakku, those TIE fighters wouldn't have attacked you. If it wasn't for me trying to desert you on Takodana, you might not have been captured and tortured and -" he paused to shudder at the thought of what happened to Rey in that cell. "If I had fought just a little harder against Kylo Ren, you wouldn't have been left to face him alone. If I -"

"Finn, stop," Rey said seriously. "Do you think I feel that way? Do you think I blame you for all of this?" She asked him. He opened his mouth to speak but she cut him off by grabbing his hand once again. "Finn if you hadn't been there in the woods against Ren, he would have thrown me against that tree and put a light saber through me before I could stand back up. You took a strike to the back for me, Finn, you almost died," she said, looking down sadly at his bandages. "No one I met before you would risk a portion for me, much less their life. And I was captured on Takodana, yes, but without you coming back for me I would have never escaped. If you had not been there, the First Order weapon would have never been destroyed, and the Republic would be dust among the stars. And if you had not found me with Beebee-Ate, the First Order would have. If they didn't blast me to bits, they would have simply took the droid away and I'd still be living the life of a starving scavenger." She stopped to laugh. "In all honesty, if we're going to throw the blame at someone for bringing me into this, it should be at BeeBee-Ate for following me home in the first place!"

She laughed again at thought of the tiny, innocent droid changing so much in the galaxy. She then looked back to her friend next to her, searching his face. He gave a small smile, and it didn't take a Jedi mind trick to see that her words had at least put him at some ease.

"I just want you to be happy. You deserve to be happy, and not hurting all the time," Finn finally said. 

Rey's eyes still held his, her eyelashes starting to flutter tiredly. "I am happy. I'm happy because I found you, and we helped save the galaxy. I'm happy because we found the map to Luke Skywalker, and now he's training me to be a Jedi. I'm happy because D'Qar is my home now, and I finally have what I consider to be a family. It's all overwhelmingly wonderful," she said, her face radiating with more kindness and thankfulness than Finn had ever seen before meeting her.

"But you still have nightmares..." Finn reminded her. But somehow the statement was gentle, concerned.

"Yes," she said slowly, pondering. "I do, and they're awful. It's hard, having this _disorder_ as the medics call it, and sometimes I don't feel like I can handle it on my own. But I have you, and so many other people who care about me. It makes it okay," she concluded laying back into him again with a yawn.

Finn smiled at that. "Well, I'm glad I could be here to make things okay. If being there for you is what it takes to help you beat these troubles, then I'm here to stay" he said, with all the certainty in the galaxy. He then noted her yawn and how her eyes were starting to close. "We can go to sleep, you look like you need it," he chuckled.

She nodded, slipping her shoes and jacket off and climbing into the blankets. Another part of their nightmare routine. She never had the dreams once she was sleeping beside Finn, loneliness defeated by the company of a friend. It makes her wonder how she lasted so long alone on Jakku.

The two settled comfortably in each others' arms in the small bed, heads close and eyes meeting. "Thank you," Rey whispered to Finn. "For caring. I mean it." And she did. She didn't think she could ever find the words to to express how much he meant to her.

"Thank you for existing. I mean it," he replied. They both gave out a soft laugh before drifting to sleep. ~

 

**Author's Note:**

> Title taken from "Sparks" by Coldplay


End file.
